I went home yesterday morning to see my Gandad. He isn’t what I remember him to be.

He now can’t get out of bed, his voice has gone totally and his hearing is non-existent.

In the three hours we were there, he was awake for 10 minutes. My Auntie and Uncle go down ever day from 2 till 9pm. My Parents go down every day after work.

When Grandad woke up he was surprised to see me there. He told me off. He has to write everything down as he has lost the ability to speak. It takes ages for him to write as he has no energy.

Like the Doctors said – its not going to be long now. You can see his body shutting down.

His speech, hearing and eyesight has gone, his breathing is getting shallower and slower. You find yourself trying to breathe for him. Once his breathing has slowed right down, the brain will stop functioning and eventually his heart will stop.

Then it will all be over. He doesn’t want resuscitation, he has made that quite clear to his family and to the Doctors. He just wants to go to my Gran.

I cant blame him. I would hate to be like that. At least he is not in pain thanks to Morphine.

As Dad said as I was just about to set off, the next time I see him will be at the funeral.

I drove back home tears running down my cheeks. Back to Rupert and the comfort of his arms.

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